I have never been to a wedding I didn’t like in my entire life.
Weddings are FUN. Like, crazy fun. I love each and every single one of my weddings. They are so full of life and love and and magic and there are always so many incredible people in the very same spot and they are, hands down, my very favorite thing to photograph – there’s just so much love (and flowers!) on wedding days and they are totally my jam. I adore them and am so thrilled that I get to photograph them for a living! I mean, is this real life?!
But! Here’s the sticky part: Photographing weddings? It’s not easy!
On the wedding day, the hours are long and the camera bags are heavy and you’re running and sweating like a fifteen year old boy during a Cross Country run and, if you’re like me, you have this huge amount of gusto to make each and every wedding the best one yet which is totally exhilarating but can also lead to a crash once the wedding wraps. And after the wedding? The real work begins!
I hand edit all of my photographs – every last one – and, on top of weddings, I have senior sessions and family sessions and engagement sessions and bridal sessions and, at the end of the day, all of these sessions need to be edited and they need to be delivered and blogged, too – and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Along with my business and my awesome husband, I also have two amazing boys and, at the end of the day, they need to know that they are the most important thing in their mother’s life – way more important than a camera or a computer screen. This is the hard part about being a business owner and being a mom: There is no magic potion that will create the perfect work/life balance. We all have to figure it out on our own, warts and sunshine and all.
I’ve officially been photographing weddings for over five years and, for all of those years, I have also been a mother. Because of this, I am constantly looking for ways to make my life as a wedding photographer a smidge easier – whether that be steps I take on the wedding day or steps I take while running my day to day business – and, today, I’m super excited to spill some of my secrets with y’all.
Let’s get going!!
One: On Wedding Days, Wear Two Different Pairs of Shoes.
Wearing two different pairs of shoes at each and every wedding has saved my life. I start my weddings in something a little fancier – usually a wedge heel (I LOVE wedge heels for weddings!) – and, after the ceremony, I typically switch into flats. I know that lots of wedding photographers pick sensible shoes over cute shoes but because I really, really like shoes, I also love buying new shoes to go with my wedding outfits and I love mixing them up halfway through the wedding. When I wear the same pair of shoes through a whole wedding, my wedding hangover is, like, thirty times worse than when I switch shoes halfway through. It is so helpful and you NEED to try it.
And BONUS! Remember how I just mentioned I pick cute shoes over sensible ones? I also believe so strongly in dressing like yourself at a wedding. I have awesome, stylish friends who can rock an all black look at every single one of their weddings. I’m not like this. I love dresses and patterns and, though I do sport a black dress every once in a while, I always dress like a wedding guest at my weddings. I love doing this because I feel comfortable in my own skin – I would feel awkward in any kind of uniform and, as a lover of color, I’d also feel really awkward in all black – and, on top of this, I feel like I blend in way more with the guests when I dress similar to them. This isn’t the right path for everyone but it totally is for me. Don’t feel pressured to dress a certain way at weddings just because you’ve seen other wedding photographers dress in a specific style. What works for one person doesn’t always work for everyone. Embrace this!
Two: Eat Chipotle Before The Wedding.
Andrew and I eat Chipotle before each and every one of our weddings and, honestly, this one took us a long time to figure out. Before a wedding, I am usually really busy – whether I’m running around the Farmer’s Market with my kids or just getting my bags ready and throwing laundry in the wash before we head out – wedding mornings go so fast and, because of this, I do not want to sit down and make lunch, even if it’s a simple lunch. Before I leave for weddings, I have to prep dinner for my kids and, if we didn’t grab lunch from somewhere, I probably wouldn’t eat at all.
Andrew comes from a Chipotle loving family and, growing up, he literally used to ride his bike there every single day to get a burrito and, while his love for Chipotle used to make me eye roll pretty hard, I totally jumped on the bandwagon within a couple years of our marriage. I love eating Chipotle before every wedding because it’s filling and way better for you than most take out and making it a wedding tradition has been such a life saver for us for so many reasons! I get grouchy when I am hungry and, while I definitely eat a full meal at every single wedding (my contract requires it!), sometimes meals are later on in the day and shooting with a full stomach is way better than an empty stomach. I’m not saying that everyone needs to eat Chipotle, exactly, but I am saying that every wedding photographer should have a filling meal they eat before every wedding and that routine makes things way easier. SO much easier – and that’s a promise!
Three: Find a Babysitter Your Kids LOVE.
This is the hardest (but most simple!) thing on my list.
When Andrew and I first started shooting weddings, my mom would come down from Kansas City and hang out with our kids. However, once my business took off and I went full time, this was no longer an option. I needed to find a local babysitter for my boys and I needed to find a good one! While this was nerve wracking at first – before 2014, I had never left Henry with a babysitter and had only left Max with a babysitter once or twice – it has been one of the most amazing aspects of my professional and personal life. Our boys love their babysitters – Max was even a ring bearer at one of their weddings! – and, best of all, we’ve come up with a system where the boys’ babysitter is basically a bonus aunt. Like, when I interviewed our (fantastic!) current babysitter, Annalee, I sat with her on the patio while the boys ran around and basically told her that, if she wanted to work with us, she was basically just going to become another family member and I needed her to be okay with that. Ha!
And this is totally true! Annalee not only watches my kids but she also sometimes watches my niece and nephew as well and, in the past, she even watched all four of them together. We adore her and, on top of watching the boys for weddings, Annalee watches the boys two to three times a week for smaller chunks of time. I also give Annalee our wedding dates way in advance and she picks the dates she can watch the boys. Since Annalee is in college, I don’t expect her to pick up every single wedding and, when she can’t or if we’re shooting a particularly long wedding or a wedding that requires an overnight stay, the boys typically stay with their aunt and uncle. This works great for us because the boys see this time as a fun time – and it is! There are so many ways to find awesome babysitters and, for me, the most important aspect of childcare is that my boys feel loved by their babysitter and that they love their babysitter, too. Once that’s set, you’re good to go!
We are so grateful to our amazing babysitters – both past and present!
Four: Listen to Audiobooks (or Podcasts!) While You Edit.
I have tried everything when it comes to editing – I’ve tried editing in complete silence and I’ve tried listening to music and, while that works for a while, I often get distracted if I’m editing for more than a few hours straight. I also have tried binge watching Netflix on long editing sprees and, while that works when you’re only half watching a show, sometimes Netflix is really distracting (obviously!) and, more importantly, it also kind of strains my eyes to look at two screens for so long, even though I’m mostly just looking at my computer screen and listening to the shows I have on. I am not the biggest TV lover so this may impact me a bit but, after trying the Netflix thing for a loooong time last year (ask me if I’ve seen every episode of Criminal Minds! The answer is yes!), I switched to audiobooks via Audible and it has totally changed my life. I LOVE editing while listening to audiobooks. I become way more focused and I have something extra to think about (in a good way!) while editing that isn’t competing with the focus I’m putting on the editing. Instead of distracting me like music and Netflix often do, audiobooks keep me so much more focused. I love it so much and, even though it’s pricier than the other options, listening to audio books has just made my life way easer. I love it!
And BONUS! You can also rent audiobooks from the library and, if you do that, it keeps the costs way down. I also have a high Audible subscription plan and, if I run low, I buy extra credits. This keeps costs down because credits cost way less than the price of an audiobook but they’re used to buy the audiobook. It is the best!
Five: Embrace the Chaos
If you are like me, you like for things to be in order.
But! If you own your own wedding photography business and have children, nothing is going to be perfect all of the time. If your house is spotless, you’re probably backlogged with edits; if you’re delivering galleries early, your house most likely looks like a tornado wiped through it. If you spend your mornings taking your kids to the park, the laundry is probably never going to be fully folded. If you stay up late working in a totally child-free zone, you’re going to be super tired the next morning and probably extra grumpy to boot. And sometimes? You’ll meal plan an awesome week of meals and, rather than running to the store for those ingredients, you’ll end up eating take out four or five times in one week. And you know what? That is okay. It’s okay for things to be chaotic!
I had a really hard time with embracing the chaos for a long time. It isn’t something that comes naturally for me – particularly when it comes to how my house looks – but, over time, I’ve really come around to the fact that adult life is chaos. It’s super busy and sometimes it’s super messy but, most of the time, it’s just super beautiful.
Whew! I think this may have been my most wordy blog post ever! Hopefully these tips were helpful for wedding photographers – especially to all the mothers out there! Now get out and shoot!! And remember a second pair of shoes to do it in.
Weddings | Engagements | Seniors | Families | Personal
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